I Don't Want to Feel This

There's a major emotional wave happening right now. It's an emotional tsunami. 

And if you're feeling it too, you know that the intensity of your emotions can run ahead of you. They can even beat out your intentional actions. Ouch. 

But rather than judging yourself, I want to remind you that there is real value - massive value - in ALL your emotions. And when emotions you don't like or want are running amuck, know that it's human to run away from them and run toward the good ones.

But you're human plus. 🦸‍♀️You're more than a three-dimensional only human. You're superhuman, you're a soul-connected human, you're a spiritually-infused human, you're an evolving human.

You're more than the emotions, but the emotions are clues to what you are.

For years I have often quoted three lines from Rudyard Kipling’s poem, ‘If’.  

“If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster, and treat those two impostors just the same…Then yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it.”

It's human to run away from tragedy and run toward triumph. I get it.

It's human to chase happiness and feel sorry for anything untoward that happens to you. Yup.

It's also human to judge triumph as good and disaster as bad.

But if you play it that way, you'll wonder where your power went.

Remember that you are a spiritual, soulful, conscious being. Or you wouldn't be reading this.

And there are gifts in both triumph AND disaster.

Yup. Really.

That's because emotions come from a wordless part of you that transmits a feeling.

And when you are in an expanded soul connected state of living, you can use your natural awareness to invite the emotional wisdom to come forward.

That may sound 'woo-woo', but I promise you that you can do this.

Because when you engage with your emotions in this way, you will learn to decipher both the information and the energy they carry. 

And that's how you can receive emotional gifts. The End.


Oh, wait! Did you want some examples?

It's all good. I've got ya covered.

Let's start with some examples of the gifts from the emotions of anger, sadness, grief, and depression. I'm sure that'll get you thinking.



Traditionally, anger is usually associated with a failure of your own expectations, but it also invites you to protect yourself or to protect others.

So whether you expressed your anger as out of control rage or chose to sit on it to be polite (heartburn, anyone?) if that's all you did, you would be missing anger's important information.

Instead, look at your anger as the energetic messenger it is. Ask it, "What needs to be protected?"

Great question!

Ask it and then listen as your inner chatty Cathy starts chatting. Take notes. Because you'll want to see the choices and take some action to thank your anger-messenger.

(This is also the start of the anger work I do with clients, so if you want some support in this...)



You can do the same thing with the emotion of sadness.  

I'm a real sadness expert so I speak from a lot of experience.

In a nutshell, sadness invites you to stop and let go of something that no longer works. And only you know what that is.

  • Maybe it’s a relationship.
  • Maybe it's a belief.
  • Maybe it's a job or a habit.

Whatever it is, the time has run out, and you’re feeling it. That's why you're sad.

What I notice is that most people don't stop when sadness appears in their life.

Instead, they distract themselves with work, Netflix, cookies, googling, wine, weed, socializing, even exercising. The list is long and exhaustive because distraction is easy these days.

And then one day they're surprised when their life stops working or when they find themself in a depressed state.

But if they welcomed their sadness, if they asked it, "What needs to be released?" ­ - another great question! - it would help them identify the attachments that no longer work in their life so they can choose to let go of them and move on.

You're liking this, aren't you? Good. Want to do grief? It's kinda my specialty. 



Grief is really an exquisite emotion. But most people wouldn't believe that. I understand.

But between you and me, grief helps you become fully human and fully alive.

As I said, I know grief intimately. Grief invites you to drop down and truly mourn the passing of what or who you love and value.

It could be the end of a marriage, the end of innocence, the end of an identity, the end of a life.

But if you don't make that journey, you can't move forward wholly in your life.

That's because grief bridges your reconnection to life after you’ve experienced some kind of deep and profound loss.

Now I know a lot of people think that grief will break them in two. But that doesn't happen.

In true grief, your heart breaks open, not apart. 

You aren't emptied by grief. You're expanded.

And when you come up and out of grief, you begin to exhale. There’s more room to breathe and more capacity to love.

(If grief is the dominant emotion in your life right now and you want whole support and a depth of increased understanding in order to move forward...)



Am I convincing you that every one of your emotions has a message of information in its energy?


Because most people try and repress the emotions they don’t want to have, they don't want to feel. Most people want to focus on the triumph ones like happiness.

Don’t get me wrong, peace and joy are lovely emotional states, but they’re only two states among all the others.

And here's a kicker -

If you focus ONLY on emotions like happiness and joy, it creates repression, suppression, and over time, depression.


That's because repressing the other emotions creates a complete lack of richness in your personality. It's not real and it shows. It's kinda fake.

Repressing the other emotions means you won't experience depth and richness in your life. It's surface-only for you. And you will get bored skimming the surface only. I promise you. #1stWorldProblems

So let's talk about depression - 



If you have repressed and not expressed, and now you find yourself depressed, a truly uninspired way to handle it is to try to shake it off with distractions of every kind.

It's very common these days what with all the ways of means of distraction.

But distractions do not bring consciousness - awareness - to your depression.

What distractions do is cement depression into a repetitive state. And you don't want that. Trust me.

So, instead, what if you brought these skills I've been telling you about to your feelings of depression?

Well, you would find out why your energy is gone, where it might be, and what your inner or higher self is trying to say to you.

Sometimes depression is a reaction to an unhealed relationship. I've seen that a lot in my 30 odd years as a psychotherapist.

Other times depression is a physiological response to something in your environment. It's worth considering.

But most often, depression is a reaction to unrelieved trauma. Did you know that? That means the trauma is still there. It hasn't been dealt with yet. 

(If depression is in your life right now and you want whole support and a depth of increased understanding in order to move forward...)


This is turning out to be a LONG post - but I hope you see it as an important one. A meaningful one.

Your emotions - all of them! - can be the most valuable tool in your growth and development, but only when you stop running away from the ones you don't want and welcome them all.

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